Sunday, 10 July 2011

So I have this thing. Some people are afraid of the dark. Some people hate gays. Some people have multiple personalities.

I can’t brush my teeth without an electric toothbrush.

“And I bet you have people carry you everywhere too, like a maharaja,” you may scoff. But it’s true. For some reason, using a normal toothbrush drives me mad, and I don’t have any more control over it than do the folks who faint at the sight of blood. Don’t scoff; it’s a disability.

And it means I have to use electric toothbrushes, or else I can’t brush.

I first got an electric toothbrush at the age of 18. It was an Oral B and it lasted a full seven years. I thought that was pretty good. The next Oral B I got didn’t last quite as long, nor did the third. I think the third only lasted a year. Last year, in disgust, I switched brands and got a Philips Sonicare. And now, less than a year later, it’s dead.

Well, not dead exactly. For the second extended period of time, it only runs for 30 seconds at a spell and won’t run any longer. The first time this happened, it lasted a week or two, and I was about to throw it away in frustration when for some reason it started working normally again. Now the same thing has happened.

Fortunately I brought a battery-powered backup with me. That’s what I’m using now. For the last couple weeks I’ve tried the sonicare occasionally to see if it’s reformed itself, and I just tried it for the last time. It’s still misbehaving and today I’ll dump it unceremoniously in a Budapest wastebin, where it belongs.

There’s no point in lugging around an electric toothbrush that I can’t use. When I get back to the states I’ll just have to buy another, and use that for the three months it’s likely to last. Don’t worry – it won’t be a sonicare.

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